Get that decision made...

It's a process when it comes to making a decision... I know, we tend to think it's an easy process yet it isn't.

When we recognise the need to make a decision, this is when our minds can go into overdrive and then we need to identify (roughly) what the decision will comprise of.

Of course, we also need to work out what we want to achieve when making this decision. A bit like the goal or outcome.

Our mind then wants to gather information to make the decision. Sometimes we make them out of habit and others, which we don't do that often involves the collection of information.

Then we look at the alternatives, the options that we have at hand or can get.

By this time we are a bit fed up with all of this tooing and frowing but it's time to look at the pros and cons of the choices available to you and if they meet the outcome you want. (Maybe, after gathering information, we might need to go back and modify our goals, in order to make them more realistic. Similarly, if we evaluate our options and realize that we don’t have enough information in order to make a well-informed decision, we might need to go back and gather more information before moving forward).

Then factor in the emotional attachment you may have to grapple with and the personal factors and feelings (think FOMO and regret as examples) ... it's tough stuff.

Now it's RISK time. You decide. You take the risk based on the above and make the decision.

Because there is so much that we need to do in order to make decisions, is it any wonder that many of us struggle with some decisions and many of us get decision fatigue.

So imagine you are trying to decide on something that clashes with your values or that you feel may impact badly for someone else. This is when the effort can just land too hard on us and we use avoidance to try and get round making decisions or we shift the responsibility onto someone else.

As if all of this isn't enough we get exhausted and the whole idea of making yet another decision, no matter how small, just breaks us. Ever heard

of analysis paralysis where you feel you just can't make a decision?

I'm telling you this because making a decision isn't that easy - so, don't beat yourself up because we all have to go through this process and everyone finds each decision different.

Some of the best methods to use when trying to make better decisions are -

- Trust your intuition. When it comes to making good decisions, you should break your habit of questioning your decisions. Next time you make a choice, stick with it. Even if it turns out not to be the best choice, OWN IT as there’s no use beating yourself up over the decision you made;

- Stop asking lots of people for their opinions. If you need to brainstorm or ask others, choose one or two people. Decision fatigue is high right now and this just adds to the indecisive feelings.

I'm no expert in anxiety but I do know from people around me that decision making or lack of it forms a HUGE park of their anxiety. Start the quick decision making process - do a Mel Robbins and say 5,4,3,2,1 then make it!!!!

We lack trust in ourselves when we question our actions or decisions.

Sometimes we might even question who we are. That can hurt.

The best you can do is to learn from your mistake. Believe that you’ll make a better choice next time, and move on.

Doing so will help you learn to be more trusting of yourself and your decision-making skills.

Of course when it comes to making really tough decisions, you should focus on the concrete facts, eliminate weak options, look at secondary factors, and visualize the future outcomes of choosing different options.

Know that everyone has to follow this process - whether they know it or not - you are not alone. The questioning we do to ourselves can really deplete our self confidence so I encourage you to lessen the self questioning and own what you decide.

I'd love you to join me in my FB Group for more tips and guidance to help you make decisions easier and with confidence - https:/www.facebook/groups/thefemaleidentityproject

I'd love to see you in my group...